collect variety sextoy industry information for invester in sex product,owner sex shop,general consumer

Monday, February 27, 2006

Shopping for Sex Toys

My Wife Wants Me to Buy Her Some Sex Toys. What Should I Get? By Louanne Cole Weston, PhD

July 9, 2001 -- It's interesting that your wife asked you to do the shopping for her. Either she is extremely anxious about making such purchases, has no idea what she wants, or wants to learn more about your erotic interests and is going about it somewhat indirectly.

Aside from the issue of her motivation in asking you to do the shopping, I can outline the basic categories of sex toys that a woman can easily use by herself.

Items for Massage: Contact with the skin is an important part of sexual arousal and physical pleasure, particularly for women. Many find that gentle caressing of the skin is an enjoyable way to start off a self-pleasuring session. So consider feathers, furry mitts, lotions, powders, and oils.

Things That Vibrate: Many women enjoy using vibration in their genital areas. Some like it on their breasts and anal areas, too. In light of all these possibilities, there are several types of vibrators from which to select.

She could try an egg-shaped vibrator on a long cord, which is primarily designed to stimulate the clitoris. Because it is small and relatively unobtrusive, some women who are reluctant to add toys to their sexuality may prefer this type.

For more powerful vibration of the clitoris, your wife could use a wand-type vibrator tipped with either a vibrating foam ball or a padded "flying-saucer" disc. Both tend to have a selection of speeds, a feature that many women like, but they can be pretty noisy.

Phallicly shaped vibrators are made in many different materials, including off-white plastic, a "jelly" material in many colors, firm foam, and latex, to name the most common. These can be safely inserted vaginally or used externally on the clitoris and surrounding area. These generally have adjustable speeds, are inexpensive, and often don't have the longevity that pricier ones do.

Another type of vibrator is the "wearable." These usually are attached to elastic bands that follow the outline of women's underwear -- and nestle up to the clitoral area, if the woman's anatomy matches up well with the cut of the elastic bands. They often look like a butterfly or a shell, and some have a vaginal inserter attached as well. These often have adjustable speeds.

A very reliable type (which is often very quiet as well) is a vibrator that is sold as a "massager" and looks like a cross between a small mixmaster and a blow dryer, with several attachments that are designed for the scalp, feet, face, and so on. Some women will use one of the attachments directly on their genitals. You can usually buy additional attachments to make this type insertable.

The last two are relative newcomers to the vibration world. One is a battery-powered tongue made of firm latex, designed to simulate oral sex when a lubricant is used. These often have several speeds.

And finally, there is a group of vibrators shaped something like a curled-up hand with the thumb and index finger extended. Usually, the "index finger" circles around when inserted into the vagina and the "thumb" vibrates the clitoral area. These often are decorated with portrayals of whimsical characters, ranging from geishas to rabbits and beavers.

Lubrication: A bottle of vaginally safe lubricant can be a "handy" item to give your wife even if she lubricates adequately, as additional slipperiness can be very stimulating during self-pleasuring. For many women, a little lubrication can help start things off. Many good lubricants are clear, made from very few ingredients (to avoid upsetting the balance of the vagina), and "revive" from a less slippery consistency when a few drops of water are added. They're also taste- and scent-free.

Inserters: Many women enjoy inserting something into their vaginas, for the sensation of fullness or to correspond with a fantasy they're having. That's where dildos (the most common name for this type of toy) come in. Generally, dildos don't vibrate; those that do are considered vibrators. Some are penis replicas and others are more fanciful items that just happen to be longer than they are wide. Some women love their dildos and others have no interest in them during self-pleasuring, despite their enjoyment of intercourse.

Anal Toys: These items come in a variety of sizes and shapes. To be a bona fide anal toy, it should have either a crosspiece that forms a "T" or a flange at the base, both of which are designed to prevent slippage up and into the anus (which can require a trip to the hospital for removal). Sometimes these items vibrate; sometimes they don't. They should definitely be used with lots of lubrication.

Beyond the Categories: Page through a sex toy catalog or web site and you will spot items that don't fit into the categories I've mentioned. These can include suction devices that are placed over the clitoris and labia, nipple stimulators, blindfolds, audio and videocassettes, erotic stories, BenWa Balls, and erotic clothing for her enjoyment of herself.

You can use this request from your wife as an opportunity to learn more about her erotic preferences. It can also be a time when you reveal parts of your imagination to her. Enjoy your shopping, and use it as anticipation builder for your return home.


Post a Comment

<< Home